歪歪花园 YY Garden

好久好久没有来，园子都荒了

虽然自己“江娘才尽”但是一直都在“串门”中

很羡慕ＪＹ游山玩水后的游记，　佩服Ａｎｎａ的兢兢业业－更新速度让我惊叹

奇怪一向更新勤的ＪＪ怎么最近好像都在潜水

 

苏格兰终于有点春天的样子，尽管天气始终不稳定，晴一天阴两天的

还是有点冷，最高温度不过１６－１８可是总是刮风一点不觉得暖

所以不放过晴天的机会下班后都会和卡卡去屋后的公园散步

 

周末和卡卡哥哥一家去公园喂松鼠，鸽子－小朋友们最喜欢啦（包括我）

 

 小朋友最可爱，见大家都在喂小松鼠，她也急忙要来果仁喂她的小松鼠

 

Ｂｙ　ｔｈｅ　ｗａｙ，　我报名了５月１０号的１０ｋ马拉松活动，旨在锻炼身体，为慈善募款。体育一向很差的我重在参与，只要我能全程坚持走完就不错了，所以锻炼也断断续续的。　还剩两周的冲刺时间了，我得加油多练啦

 

************************************************************************************

5月10号本来是该摩拳擦掌的日子，一直期待这一次的挑战

早上7点多就爬起来往市中心赶去集合地点

到了才发现因为早上为了填号码牌后面的健康信息而忘了放回包里

到了集合地点却不见一个人，本来早上晴朗的天也下起倾盆大雨 真是诸事不利

就在此时我的右眼眉头之间痛得睁不开眼

眼看着没有时间回去拿号码牌只好放弃了

回来的公车上开始觉得很不舒服，好不容易忍到一下车就吐了

眼睛更痛了，跟着头也痛起来

完全不知道为什么会这样，开始害怕不是传染到猪流感了吧

卡卡笑我又没有打喷嚏危言耸听，

一回到家就倒头昏睡了一整天一觉到天亮身体莫名的就恢复了

同时庆幸幸亏忘了号码牌不然跑到一半不舒服吐在路上多尴尬

再一次证明冥冥中自有定数？

今天早上看报纸，原来昨天的跑步有上万人参加创造全英最大规模很壮观，

可惜我失之交臂了

不怕，明年我会有备而来

1， <Slumdog Millionaire>

故事设计和拍摄手法都很好，当之无愧的获奖影片

2， <The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons>

很伤感的爱情故事，除了爱情之外，从Benjamin 身上也会有很多人生方面的感悟

3， <海角七号>

人气很高的一部电影，很喜欢故事的tone,历史怀旧感和现代人的流行元素，加上本土文化和永远卖座主题-爱情，是人气和气质兼备的电影

4， <Bolt>

喜欢动画片的朋友不容错过的一部电影，讲明星狗在电影中演super dog并且认为自己真的又super power当它走入现实中历险一切都不如它所想的如意。 其中配角很抢镜哦，很多人都是为了它才去看的

5， <Yes Man>

Jim Carrey的翻身之作，喜欢Romantic Comedy的人可以看看

6， <Confession of a Shopaholic>

也是一部轻松的浪漫喜剧， 喜欢女主角，男主角也很帅，女生们通常会喜欢的片

7, <Ghost Town>

风格不太一样的喜剧，男主角有自己的幽默style

8, <Push>

关于特异功能的动作片，能预见未来的叫watcher, 能左右人们大脑的叫pusher， 当然最后正义战胜邪恶。故事还不错

 

 

 

96 部电影；

25 本书；

40 部电视剧，动画+短剧，

小猪存钱罐里9磅27的硬币

诠释了我的2008日常生活

 

3月3号，7月22-28， 10月1日，10月15，11月2， 12月4号，25号& 31号等等等等

点亮我的2008的几个时刻

 

四川地震，奥运会，毒奶粉，经济是我对2008的几个印象索引

 

在我真正想要总结2008时，我的记忆却是空白

倒也并没有觉得虚度--日志本里分明写得密密麻麻

2008并没有不快乐，不充实

只是我希望我的2008是一篇散文或报告文学，实际上却只是断断续续的点，单独并立的事件的编月大事记；

感觉上少了我最想要的那个能够连贯和支撑能让2008完整的东西--是什么我也不知道

 

对于2009，我有点被动--

仿佛昨天记忆还停留在2002年夏天的自习室，2005的8月的飞机上，2007年6月的宿舍里，2008年的7月的欧洲

还来不及抱佛脚就已经在2009的早晨醒来

如果没有完成2008的计划，心理上就总会觉得要继续背负过去而不能轻装上路

总是习惯在新的一年列to do list

今年却觉得很没有状态

如果没有重新出发的心态，年轮对我来说没有意义

探索的旅程仍然ING

希望不久的某一天我可以大声宣布我的2009真正来临了

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

时间在心中每日每日沉淀，

沉淀出绵长的淡淡的回忆穿插某些深刻时刻的瞬间感觉点缀

真情的人似乎永远喜欢怀旧

我用怀旧的心情去一遍遍思念我在乎的人和事

直到沉淀的感情越积越多，多到溢出伤感

每天背负着回忆的人步伐尤其沉重

再沉重也得继续背着走，因为前方的路充满迷雾，

几时 何处的未知，必须以温热的回忆来接招

最近的稍显紧张的工作让我第一次感受到什么叫工作压力，甚至有那么一两天早晨醒来有点惧怕上班

心道不可逃避不可轻易就此退缩

决心要积极调整心态，调整精神

正好卡卡周末也休息，我们安排去爱丁堡参观幻象馆( Camera Obscura & World of Illusion) 和国家博物馆（National Museum of Sotland)

早上8点半就起床准备动身，到5点半才坐火车回家居然浑然不觉时间流逝，可料我们玩得很尽兴

再次想起以前旅行时的感触--旅行时目标单一明确，脑中没有多余的杂念和干扰，身心自然也放松了

晚上回来整理一天的收获，写写游记和感想，小有充实感

 

出于这一点，十字绣有异曲同工之妙--看似单一重复的工作，其实是让脑子集中到一种单纯的境界

我一向喜欢重复动作但不用动脑的活动，比如玩俄罗斯方块，astro pop, 还有十字绣

唯一缺点是 一旦上瘾欲罢不能，可以窝在沙发里绣坐几个小时直到眼睛酸痛

 

另一种让人感觉放松和有充实感的事是读书。有时候工作一天回到家感觉头有点懵，耳根不净，怕吵觅静（现在终于理解爸爸了）

对了一天的电脑再回家对着电脑都不觉让我头大，

这时候听着古典或者柔和音乐，看书是最棒的享受

你的大脑会转换一种方式，因为另一种元素的刺激使原先紧绷的神经放松下来

被书中情节吸引的话，会让你感觉进入到另一个世界而忘掉你实在的存在

好书总是会刺激你的思想，结合自己的理解力，迸发出不同的火花，不自觉产生一种充实感

一种除社会经验外的对私人思想和情感的充实感

 

还有一个就是养宠物。宠物是很好的精神寄托对象，每当我躺在沙发读书的时候，小咪会过来卧在我身上，

我一边抚拭她，一边看书，有一种宁静祥和的感觉

 

现在的环境太嘈杂了，要获得身心的宁静要靠自己的积极安排，我一向认为中国人比外国人更抗压，

但同时又容易忽略自己不断扛压而日益脆弱的身心

每个人都会有自己的减压方式，不断放下才能再不断吸收

 

 

 （一按钮小狗就会弹琴            （反射原理造成3D无限延续的幻象，        （一画双义）                        

两只小猫就唱歌，很Q）              让我联想到电影eagle eye)

 

  

    （第一只克隆的多利羊，出生于爱丁堡近郊，死于1997年，现展于苏格兰国家博物馆）

 

 

              *********************************************************************************

Today I had a stressful day right from 9am to 5pm -- literally the whole day.

 

Everyday, the first thing I do when I arrive at my workplace is to get keys from reception. However, so many times there was no one on duty and I had to strech my arm to get keys from a little hole that leads to the tray of keys. This morning, I buzzed when the girl was leaving the office. I thought she didn't hear me so I did the same thing as usual--fetching keys myself. Suddenly that girl appeared and said "You are not supposed to do this" with a strong bitching tone. I wanted to say, well, this was not the first time that nobody in the office and I didn't want to wait for ages to be late for work. I am not used to blaming people, so I just said, sometimes there was nobody in the office and I usually waited so long. Then the girl said "I did come back for you, didn't I?", sounding like I was doing something wrong. I didn't say I was right but I wouldn't do that if there was someone on duty. And as I said earlier, this was not the first time happened. Why should I be late for work because of some other person's irresponsibility?!

 

Since we have been recruiting new staff recently, a lot of people phoned in to request application packs to send out. Imagine ever since 9am, the phone never stopped ringing for all kinds of reasons, mainly of which are for applying. I had no time to do my own work but pick up dozens of phone calls constantly (unfortunately nobody was in today but me). Some applicants were very impatient when I asked them to spell their address for me. You could clearly tell from their tone. I was very annoyed but I had to act friendly and professional, but deep in my heart, I just want to say, "What the hell?！ YOU are the one who can't speak clearly and YOU are the one who wants to be sent an application pack but you make it seem like I am begging you to give me your details!!!"  Think about it, after hours of non-stop calls, nobody could concentrate well and your accent is so BAD. And guess what, after checking his post code, I found that guy actually spelled his own address wrong! There were a couple of people who were very nice and understanding, however I was always annoyed by awful people more easily and found it hard to get over them.

 

That was happening at 3pm and I didn't know my anger had only just started. I faxed a couple of Change of Details Forms to payroll company to update staff data. Then one of the administrators emailed back, saying it was too late to put in payroll as the deadline was last week, although she would put that through for me. Not later than 10 minutes later, that same lady phoned me to bitch at me about the same thing again. "You are not supposed to add more work as the deadline already passed. Today I am in good mood so I amended it for you but no more." I had to apologize for any inconvenience caused and thank her again and again. To be honest, I was the one who found it hard to cope with both sides (between staff and payroll company). The staff handed in their requests to change their bank details and asked me to put through ASAP so that they could be paid in that account. I was trying to be nice and said it was probably too late for payroll but I would try for you. Otherwise, if anything happens when pay day is due, they will complain and blame at me ( but why didn't you report earlier if it was so important?!)

 

What is worse, just 20 minutes after I promised I wouldn't do that again I got a phone call from another member of staff trying to change bank details. It had to be put through as his old account was closed already, which means his wages wouldn't get in his account. He didn't report earlier because he forgot (it was me reminding him when he called). So you could imagine that I had to email that bitch again with a lot of apologies and appreciations to make her change again. I know this is annoying and inconvenient for you, but I was just doing my job and trying help people. Why should I be bitched at???

 

Finishing work at 5pm with a last phone call for application pack at 4:58pm (exactly), I stepped out of the office. Of course, it was raining and I 　missed the bus as soon as I almost reached bus stop. Suddenly I just felt what a stressful day with all the above adding up. Couldn't wait to write whose words down. I found I always want to speak English when I am in a bad mood.

 

Feel very relieved now...

 

 

两个人要经历多少，多少奋斗才能迎来60周年结婚纪念日？

两个人都要保持健康的身心，至少活到80岁以上

两个人始终如一的关心对方，支持对方60多年

两个人经历60年的风风雨雨，见证时代的脚步，社会的发展

不只是发明原子弹，奥运会夺冠或是当选总统才是伟人和英雄

能一起走过60年婚姻仍然相依相守的人也很伟大。

 

（女王写贺卡祝福贺他们的结婚纪念日）

 

 

 

September 19th is Cal's grandparents' diamond wedding anniversary. I was much honored to be invited to witness the great love between them that last over 60 years. When they both gave speeches to talk about their secret of long-lasting relationship, I couldn’t help but wonder how much effort you need to put to be happy together for 60 years. Marriage is much more complicated than relationship.

 

How much effort you take to prove that you two would have the same faith in each other and convince that you are the one to each other?

 

How much effort you put to always try to work out a way to comprise any disagreements with your partner?

 

How hard you should work to support your family financially and morally?

 

How much effort you need to try to understand each other and always support each other under no conditions?

 

Every single point requires great and consistent effort, which probably is the most difficult part. Think about how much effort you will have done in 60 years!

 

Cal said that back to grandparents’ times, their life and society might be simpler and they had purer faith in love.  That means people in modern times may need more efforts than them.

 

Cal, I don’t know how much difficulties we would be confronted with in the future but I wish we would try our best to maintain this relationship with pure and strong faith in each other, like your grandparents.

 

 

下了好大决心要写这一篇，虽然和现在奥运的喜气不太搭配，但是看到英国媒体对中国的负面新闻不断，而且穷追不舍，从奥运之前到今天看到整版的“对中国polish image”之下的“黑暗面”的提醒让我恨不得拍案而起。他们居然把东突独立，西藏独立，和法轮功说成无辜神圣被迫害的团体和宗教！尽管西方媒体如此的打压，我仍然看到中国强大对他们的威胁感， 当地人民更加了解中国， 很多去过中国的人都爱上中国。政治和媒体可以蒙蔽人们的视觉，但不可能完全蒙蔽人们的心。中国的强大国际影响势不可当。 同时我也希望我们中国人永远不要忘记历史，不要忘记当年的耻辱和苦痛，继续加油。码下此文共勉。

 

7月末去了波兰， 此行主要有两个目的， 一是参加朋友的婚礼， 其二是想亲眼见证传说中的奥斯维辛集中营。

23日的天气阴沉伴着小雨，仿佛是格外为了配合我们的行程。奥斯维辛集中营共分两个部分--前期和后期所建。大概10点左右在导游的带领下我们走进集中营（PART 1）的大门--一个简单铁铸的大门。从大门望去，宽敞的大道两旁是一排排像积木搭得整齐的砖房。整个营都被层层铁丝网圈成的长方形大方块。 铁丝网前插着禁越的警示牌，骷髅头的标志虽然有点退色，看起来仍然阴森森。

 

我们随着导游进入一幢幢房子， 每一幢房子结构都一模一样，用来关各国政治犯和犹太人，现在用来做展厅。第一个展厅展览所剩不多的珍贵的图片，见证着很多被纳粹战败逃亡销毁证据前的样子。印象最深的一幅是在一条长长的火车道前，一个德国军官站在正中央手指指向他的右边，一队人正向那个方向走去， 军官的右边站着另一队人，大多是老人和小孩。原来右边的人会被送进集中营工作，左边的老弱病残直接会被送进密封室处死。导游介绍说你看到照片里的人表情并不惊慌害怕是因为他们并不知道等待他们的是如此的劫难。最初的集中营被宣传是犹太人集中区，专门划分出来供犹太人一起生活的社区。有些人甚至是慕名买了火车票到这的！

 

纳粹研究出最快捷的屠杀方式是投放一种化学药粉，每次有近千人被赶进一间小屋子，室内温度很快上升，当达到一定温度时药粉就会挥发成毒气在短短十几二十分钟内杀死所有的人。 然后德军要等几十分钟等毒气散尽，然后把一具具尸体运到焚化塔里处理尸体。 杀人的过程连20分钟都不到，唯一对他们来说的麻烦是整个处理尸体的过程要几个小时。以这样的速度他们每天都要处理上万具尸体。

 

 图一 进入参观火化炉； 图二 唯一没有被销毁的焚化塔

 

另一个深刻的印象是，一个展厅内每一间里堆放着无数的头发，各种刷子，皮鞋， 餐具等等。设想整整一间大房间堆满了头发，而据导游说这只是德军来不及处理的一小部分。纳粹不放过任何可以创造价值的机会， 他们把所有的犯人的财产都剥夺，甚至包括女人的头发被用来做他们军服的衣料的一部分。因此你所看到前期他们拍的女犯人的登记免冠照片全部都是寸头。

 

还有更多令人发指的展览， 比如犯人睡得简陋的不能再简陋的木床，但是你仍然想不到每一层木床要挤着10个人。更甚者男女待遇天壤之别。

 

最阴森恐怖的要数尽头的处罚室。处罚室里面一切都保持当年的样子。 我们排着队鱼贯而入，刚刚走进去就被那种黑暗阴冷的气氛感染，我不禁打了个冷颤。里面的处罚室都是暗无光线，狭窄低矮的房间， 这是为了惩罚轻犯规者不能休息站几天几夜。最普遍的惩罚是让重犯饿死和枪毙。墙壁的地方就在房子的侧面的空地。和处罚室相邻的房子的窗户都被木板订起来只留上面一点空隙，这是为了一，防止住在里面的犯人看到处决，成为罪恶的目击者， 二是为了生化武器或化学毒药试验所用。

 

           （处决的空地）

 

经过3个多小时的参观， 我们离开集中营的第一部分，短暂自由活动10分钟以后接着驱车前往集中营的第二部分--Birkenau

 

Birkenau是在第一部分后不久因为几乎全世界的犹太人都被运送而来而无法承载而加盖的。 据说是第一部分的20倍。它曾经是7个村子的所在，后被纳粹驱逐而改建的。工厂为了方便也该在附近，即使这样犯人步行去做工都要几十分钟。

 

从狭窄的小铁门挤入，放眼一片广阔的空地和稀疏的平房（大部分都被纳粹毁掉。 中央是一条火车道， 我立刻认出那就是之前照片里的“生死火车道”。 这里的平房因为规模太大纳粹不愿花费， 和之前的砖房相比条件更差 -- 稀疏的木板搭成的漏风的房子，十几米长的房子只有一个小暖炉供暖。这里大多住的是女囚，和男囚相比他们睡觉连破薄毯都没有， 而是睡稻草。在那么恶劣的条件下很多人都患有严重的痢疾。在波兰冬天酷寒，很多人不到1个月就死了。

 

      

 

有人说现实远比人的想象还要夸张。看过奥斯维辛之后你会深深体会那段残忍的历史远远超过你能想像的程度。在集中营的囚犯，衣不蔽体，目光呆滞，在失去自由的时候尊严从何谈起。最令我不能理解的是，在集中营的大门旁边的一座房子是波兰的普通民居，曾经是管理集中营的德国军官的家， 他的家人，孩子都在里面过着正常的生活。军官下班后就回到家回到他的普通生活。 我实在难以理解他们怎么可以这么心安理得过着冷血屠杀另一个民族？别人的家园就不是家园么？

 

令我稍稍心慰的是结束时回到售票大厅， 看到墙上挂着二战时冒着危险帮助掩护逃难的波兰和犹太人的那些平凡的英雄。他们像萤火虫般暗黑的年代用自己微弱的光支撑一点希望。

 

直到现在，集中营第一展厅的入口的那句警言还深印在我的脑海中--“忘记历史的人将会重现历史”所以我们绝对不可以忘记历史